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Wow, just wow.

So, today I got my results back from my doctor. (I haven't had a period since C was born, I didn\t think it was a big deal but my doctor thought otherwise. He made me get a bunch of different blood tests.) Well, the results are.. i have a low thyroid. No big deal, it's actually what I thought the issue was. I was prescribed medication and hopefully it gets better. Hopefully. I need to return to the lab in 6 weeks to get my blood taken again to see if the medicine is doing it's job. If the medicine is not doing it's job then I will be booked for a CAT scan, as with my Thyroid being low I also have low estrogen levels aswell as some other hormones that are low. My Doctor told me that the CAT scan will show if I have a rare tumor pushing on my pituitary gland. Some of you may be asking, pituitary gland, where is that? Well, science lesson here, it\s in my brain, it's in your brain. Everyone has one. I think I should be freaking out more but I've kinda of subsid...
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My Dreams

Dreams that I have for myself. I want to become a high school Biology teacher, make a decent income to provide for Callen. If I am still raising him on my own when that dream comes true. I want to be the best mom I can be to him. I dream of having a nice house big enough for maybe 2 more kids and a husband. I dream for an amazing father for Callen. If I could be I would choose to be with Callen's real dad but that we will just play by ear. I really wish my dreams would come true. They seem like general easier goals to achive.
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Me time?

Why is that when I want to do something for myself I'm selfish? Its not like I want to go out every night and party and get wasted off my ass. All I'm asking is a half an hour 5 or 6 days a week to go to the local gym and work out. After callen falls asleep for the night my parents could atleast listen for him. He rarely wakes up in the middle of the night anymore and its not like ill be gone all night. Ugh I want to do this one thing for myself so I stop feeling so depressed about my body. I mean seriously going from 130 pounds to 175 pounds is a big jump. Everyone is always like lose weight and you'll feel so much better, well how the fuck do you expect me to lose the weight? I eat right and I still don't lose weight I obviously need to be doing something physical to get this awful amount of weight off. UGH! OK rant over.
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